More Birth Control Ranting

Sorry to harp on this subject for two posts in a row, but the subject of birth control really does warrant consecutive posts, since it seems to be dominating our current national discussion.

I would have thought that 50 years after the introduction of "the pill," the hullabaloo would have subsided a little. Apparently though, the idea that women can and should control their fertility is still a very revolutionary one. What I'm having trouble wrapping my mind around is the thought that somehow not using contraception is a "family value."  It seems to me that contraception is the very foundation of family values.  After all, what better way to promote healthy families than by allowing couples to plan when to have their children and how many they can reasonably manage to care for?  When people are prepared and willing to welcome children into their home, those children will be better provided for and the family as a whole will be stronger.

On a personal note, I have been taking birth control pills since the age of 16.  I had a very smart mother who, although never giving me the impression that my becoming sexually active was ok with her, nevertheless told me that if I simply couldn't talk to her about it, then I should at least go to Planned Parenthood and make sure to be safe about it.  And that's exactly what I did.  And if I hadn't, I would probably now be raising a child with my then boyfriend, who was incredibly abusive on many different fronts.  If I were still with him, I would be miserable, and in turn would probably make a very miserable mother.  If I wasn't still with him, I would be attempting to share custody with a terrible human being and all of the struggle that sort of situation implies, which would probably be very painful for my child(ren).

As it turns out, I didn't end up pregnant as a teenager, and was thus able to leave an abusive relationship, go to college, enter the workforce, and find a more suitable man to marry and raise a family with.  The result?  I have 2 wonderful, happy children who live in a stable, happy home with two parents who are beyond thrilled to have them in their lives.  We were able to have our children at a point in our lives when we were emotionally and financially able to care for them, which means we are able to focus our time and energy on loving them and raising them to be good people, which will, in turn, make them better parents one day.

None of this would have been possible without access to birth control.  And yet, we are made to feel that using this wonderful gift of technology makes us lesser people somehow.  That by taking charge of our fertility, we are "sluts."  For most of human history, pregnancy was an inevitable outcome of having sex, and maybe for that reason it was necessary to use shame as a tool for preventing unwanted pregnancy.  But what's the excuse now?  Why must women continually be told that if they dare to use their bodies for pleasure, they should be willing to submit to the inevitable outcome?  We have the tools to prevent pregnancy now, and women should not be shamed into not using those tools to better their lives, and the lives of their children down the road.

Birth control is THE family value.